In remembrance of a great Artist and a few thoughts on procrastinating :o)

Two years ago,on this day, one of my very favorite singer/songwriters, Dan Fogelberg passed away from prostate cancer at the young age of 56. I didn't find out until January and I was heartbroken. I had heard his voice in my ears for as long as I could remember; been comforted by his music and inspired by the poetry of his lyrics all of my life. Something that made this particularly difficult for me was a sin of omission on my part. I had felt for years that I wanted to write to him and thank him for sharing his talents with the world and what it meant to me personally in my own life. But I never did. I kept putting it off because "oh he probably doesn't even read his mail" and "I doubt it would mean much~ who am I, anyway? Just another fan~ he has so many~ it won't matter." Well, after discovering he had died I went to his website and saw what his wife had written to the fans and burst into tears (yes, I know this is depressing, people~ but there's a lesson in here, I promise! ;o) ) She wrote a very heartfelt letter thanking everyone who had written to him during this difficult time~ that those letters were a great source of comfort and solace to him as he struggled and fought with his disease and meant the world to him~ that he read every single one. I realized that I'd missed my chance to give something back to this man who had given me so much~ I realized that it did matter. (I have since written my letter and hope to have the chance to thank him on the other side someday.) It does matter that we tell people how we feel about them~ that we thank them, love them, praise them, comfort them and uplift them while we still can because we never know when that opportunity will be beyond us. I don't know when I've ever regretted giving to someone, or saying a kind word. But I have many aches in my heart and deep regrets over the times I didn't. This incident with Dan taught me a valuable lesson that I will never forget, and it's summed up nicely in the words of Emerson~ " "You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late." Postponing our good desires and more generous instincts tends to suffocate our better natures, one omission at a time~ and what a good time of the year to remember that and try to do better~ to look outside ourselves and our comfort zones and give what is truly ours to give~ our hearts. I am grateful for this lesson~ I only wish I had learned it sooner.
I am really trying to take those opportunities as they come now~ and I'm noticing that all the fears and insecurities (the "oh we don't even really know each other~ maybe she'll think it's wierd that I bring that over" kind of stuff) that held me back in the first place have been replaced with peace. Even more importantly, I am trying to make sure that I don't miss those opportunities with my own family, who are far too easy to take for granted; sometimes it feels easier to take a meal to a homeless shelter than it does to give my teenager a pat on the back or to take that extra 10 minutes away from doing housework to play Bionicles with my little ones (oy! Bionicles!) ;o) In the end it IS much more difficult to put off doing the good thing (ooh I feel a Covey quote coming on! *running to bookshelf*)Here it is: “We are exhausted far more from the tension of internal disharmony~ not doing what we know we should~ than from hard, unremitting work. And, naturally, the very effort to escape such tension~ pleasure seeking, self-indulgence, escapism~ produces more tension.” ~ Stephen R. Covey

So true. Nothing worse than a nagging conscience~ except when it's too late to appease it. My children won't see this before Christmas, so I feel it's safe to write it here (shhhhh!;o) )~ but there will be a gift for each of them under our tree this year~ I'm going to wrap it in true Martha Stewart fashion~ a beautiful box with ribbons and bows and inside it's going to have a letter to them~ from my heart to each of them individually. In this letter I'm going to commit (oooh scary! I know! But it must be done!) something to them that I know in my mother's heart they need from me that they have not been getting. Something that I know I will regret not giving them if I never had the chance again (there will be one for my husband too~ he won't have internet for another 5 days so here's hoping he won't read this either! lol) As I was going over the toy checklist in my head, it came to me that this would be the most important gift~ for them and for me. Too often my focus is on the fun stuff~ the thought of seeing their eyes light up over that longed-for toy~ but that's easy, really. What will mean the most to them is seeing my eyes light up when they walk in the room each morning~ the everyday gift of letting them know how much they mean to me and how they've blessed my life. That will last long after the favorite Bionicle has disappeared from the playroom :o)

PS: men~ get your prostates checked! It's really never too early and it's oh so fun! Really! *cough*

And for those who are unfamiliar with Dan's music~ (most people my age are lol) I've posted an all-Dan playlist just for today in his honor. I really love his old stuff the best~ and his Christmas album is beautiful. Someday I will do him proud and play his music on my dusty old guitar~ it misses me, I know it does lol Maybe this year I may be able to get back into lessons *wishhopedream*

Dan in his younger days (waaay back when I was little. Way back.) ;o)